Proverbs 31:3 - Do not spend your strength on women, your vigor on those who ruin kings. The King James version says: Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.
Strength: chayil – khah-yil - a force: of men, means or other resources. Ways: derek – deh-rek -the road you travel, how you operate, your habits & lifestyle.
This command is to a young man:
Do not give your strength to a woman (your resources: mental, emotional, physical, financial).
Do not give your way – to a woman. (the road you walk, your habits, your lifestyle, the priority of your thoughts and attention) –to women, to those who ruin kings.
Young man: The focus of your attention, energy and resources - should be on your God-given calling and purpose.
This starts with fulfilling the specific assignments God has for you today. Obey what God told you to do today!
Pursue God's Plan for you, not the woman He has for you. Focus on preparing for your future! - not your future wife.
Proverbs 31:10-12 - A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. Verse 30: Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a wife who fears the LORD is to be praised.
A wife of noble character, you can’t find one. She is un-findable, no matter how many you pursue. You can’t buy one, she is worth more than all the money you have.
Only God can bring her to you.
He will not… until you are ready - or she won’t want to commit her heart and life to you. Remember, she is of noble character, fully trustworthy, worth more than every penny you have!
Spend your strength and vigor on complete and joyful obedience – pursuing his presence and his priorities for you today! Focus on the Fear of the LORD, Diligence, and winning souls. Fully and completely obey everything He told you to do today… to worship, to prepare, to work, to serve, and to love others to the salvation and obedience of Christ.
Spending your strength and vigor on a woman – does not make her of noble character.
You can help her grow to maturity in the LORD, but character is who she is already, not who you hope she is, and definitely not what you hope she will become.
The one God brings (the wife of your youth) will already be of noble character. It’s what He has already been preparing in her BEFORE she met you! Before He brought her to you.
Spending all your money on a woman won’t make her worth more than what you spent, or more than all you have. Spending your strength and vigor on a woman will not mean you can fully trust her, and will not determine or have any effect on whether she will bring you good all the days of her life.
ONLY observation, not the spending of strength – will reveal if she is of noble character… If she is worthy of full confidence… If she does you good all the days of her life – from the very first day.
She either is of noble character or she isn’t. She is either fully trustworthy or she isn’t. She has either done you good all the days of her life since the day you met… Or she hasn’t.
Are you spending your strength and vigor on a woman who is not of noble character?
If so, you are being ruined. You are being made ‘good for nothing.’ You are becoming use-less. (Proverbs 31:3)
By the way, are you? Are you all these things for your wife someday?
Are you of noble character?
Are you fully trustworthy? Are you doing your wife good all the days of your life, even today? even before God brings her to you? Or, are you spending your strength, and affections on women? If she could see you right now… what would she see you doing? Would she be drawn to lay down her life for yours?
Your job is not to give a girl noble character. You cannot. Only God can. Either he has or he hasn’t. You cannot give it to her, or put it in her, or pray it into her. She has to have chosen it. She is either of noble character – or she isn’t. Nothing you can invest in a girl will make her trustworthy. She is… or she isn’t. Doing you good all the days of her life is determined by her choice alone. Nothing you could invest in her will change it.
Now remember, you will still need to love – a wife is a responder. Why would she respect you, or want to lay down her life to walk together with you, if you do not lead in love… If we are to love our wife as Christ loves the church – we love him because he first loved us.
But only God can bring you the wife of your youth, a girl of noble character, a girl who is fully trustworthy, and who does you good all the days of her life from the very first day.
Are you doing her good today? Or are you spending your strength and vigor and affections on other women?
What Should Your Focus Be?
Spend your strength and vigor on his specific plan for you today!
Fear God, Be Diligent, and Win Souls – to the salvation and obedience of Christ.
And God will bring you a wife of noble character, in his best time, who fears the LORD, fully trustworthy, to help each other fulfill his calling and purpose for your lives together; who does you only goodfrom the very first day– all the days of her life.
God will bring you both together in his perfect time to demonstrate to the world what a relationship that honors God looks like; and what God will do through a young couple whose hearts are fully devoted to him.
A PRISM Topic: is God’s Word on a single subject. A Relationship Topic is a perspective from God's Word on relationships. A PRISM Topic Packet is a grouping of PRISM or Relationship Topics of similar subjects... part of the M: Meditate on theWord of PRISM – (5 Things You Can Do Daily in God’s Word) to transform the way you think. Ask God what PRISM Topic or Relationship Topic He wants you to meditate on today.Take your PRISM Topic, Relationship Topic or Packet with you! Come back to them multiple times a day! “It is to be with him, and he is to meditate on it day and night, so that he may learn to fear the LORD…” - Deuteronomy 17:19