​Love you all, praying for you.
 
I just love God’s Word.  It’s so un-pius.  Irreligious.  It’s the story of Jesus, who was the biggest counterculture revolutionary of all time.  He turned the world upside down.  He exposed religion, and invited relationship, the very heart of God.  He exposed the devil’s grip of sin, and offered freedom.   I love that God’s Word is not religion, it’s relationship, restoration, ridiculously simple, redeeming, and loving, and one hundred percent truth, for those who will receive it.   God recently brought to mind one of my fondest childhood memories.  Always been a NFL Football fan, as long as I can remember.  Growing up in Milwaukee the home of half the Green Bay Packers home games at the time, until all moved to Lambeau about a year or two after I had left for college.  I would love to watch my beloved Packers despite loss after loss, year after year, pretty much my entire childhood, until a guy named Reggie White showed up, and restored the entire franchise to respectability.  We hadn’t seen that since Vince Lombardi, and I was too young to remember that…  It’s amazing what can happen when just one man shows up – who puts their faith in God.  Granted he was quite a large man, but that’s beside the point.  The NFL for a season spanned the spectrum of end zone celebrations deemed too outlandish, so they made rules that restricted them, and then loosened them up a bit more recently.   I’ll never forget one of my favorite Packer moments, surprisingly, given the circumstance...  In Lambeau Field.  The Minesota Vikings had come to town – of whom we had no love for, especially now that the future Hall of Famer - Randy Moss was on their team.  I’ll never forget that game he scored a touchdown and in celebration – in response to the earful he’d been getting the whole game from the rather impolite Packers faithful in the endzone… turned his back to them, and with his hands simulated the motion of lowering his knickers to share with them – the full moon.  Didn’t really do it, mind you, just pretended.  And the entire end zone section went full-on apoplectic!  As did the rest of the stadium, when the replay hit the big screen.  It was bad enough that he scored on us, and they were winning, but do be that rude, disrespectful and impolite… it was almost more than they could bear!  I however, was perhaps the only one in Wisconsin at the time who thought - that was hilarious.  I gained a whole new level of respect, dare I say almost even love for this unfairly gifted wide receiver, despite the fact that my love for my Packers never waivered.  That was hilarious!  It still makes me smile thinking about it.  The greatest end zone celebration ever!  But it showed me something.  Sometimes a full moon is in order.  Your enemy the devil, has recruited a crowd of accomplices in your life who will constantly yell things at you from the stands.  They’re not in the game mind you, they are just accusing you, berating you, blaming you, reminding you of your past, your lack, your mistakes, trying to bring you down.  Mooning them is not the moral of the story.  But not letting them affect you is.  One of my favorite stories in the Bible was when God through the prophet of God  - told the widow to take her sons, take the jars, go inside her house and shut the door.  Sometimes, you just have to - shut the door.  Sometimes you just have to shut out all the outside voices, the screamers, the slanderers, the condemners, the devil in your ear…  Sometimes you have to just ignore the part truth that their accusations resonate with.  Sometimes you gotta believe what God says about Himself and His promise for you… not what others say about you, whether part true or not.  Sometimes you just gotta trust God, turn toward Him, take that first step of obedience from here, right now, and never look back.  It’s kinda like a full moon so to speak.  Your audience is One, not all the haters.  Jesus forgave you, He is leading you, you run with Him, don’t worry about opposing team fans.  Listen to God, not them.  Keep your eyes on Him, not anyone else, not your past, or your failures, or your limitations - just what God told you to do today – to obey.  Let Him lead you -  You will score touchdown after touchdown.  Not everyone will be happy.  But you don’t even need to spite them or show them.  God said he’ll prepare a table for you in the presence of your enemies.  Just Love Him, Hear His voice.  Do it immediately.  And when it comes to the devil that used to so easily trap you in those sins that once so easily beset you, let him see your backside, as you head the opposite direction on the path God’s got for you!  Follow Him, Keep your eyes on Him, and He’ll lead you to green pastures, quiet waters, through valleys and over mountains.  He’ll never leave you, not alone, not the same, not lacking… He’ll never leave you short, with anything missing.  He will lead you completely.  You can trust Him fully.  And if you don’t grow weary in well doing, if you don’t turn back from that obeying… He’ll set a table for you in front of everybody.  He gets the glory, you get the blessing.  Just keep your eyes on Him. 
 
Love you all,
dad

Love you all, praying for you. 
 
I just love Gods Word, it gives truth, and starting points.  Foundations – for every good thing that God has for you, if you’ll receive it.   Have you ever heard of the marriage foundation?  Ephesians 5:33 - Love and Respect. (There’s a book of that title – worth the read).  In Ephesians Chapter Five, God said Husbands love your wife, wives respect your husband.  Why didn’t God tell husbands to respect their wife?  Why didn’t God tell wives to love their husband?  (Actually, he did, but we’ll get to that in a minute).  Something that always puzzled me.  Why do so many women insist that men treat them with respect?  Who are you hanging out with that needs to be told that?  How many men do you know that don’t?  Why do you even know them?  Why would you have any contact whatsoever with someone like that?  Disrespectful men?  You need to change your circle.   God didn’t have to tell a husband to respect his wife because the command He gave husbands was infinitely higher.  Love your wife means you lay down your life for them, like Jesus laid down his life for you!  That is the polar opposite of disrespect.  It’s at the other end of the spectrum.  Love is a much bigger commitment than respect.  If you love your wife, you will check off the respect box, long before you even start.  If husbands love their wives, wives will love their husbands, they can’t help it.  He gives her what she needs and longs for every day, she will just naturally love him, she can’t help it.  How he treats her, makes it easy for her to love Him.  A lot of husbands respect their wives, they were taught to respect women, but love?  That means lay down their life, that’s a whole ‘nother level, and most men don’t do that, not naturally…  That’s supernatural, it’s where you need God to help you through the Holy Spirit – to love your wife.  Men, like women, don’t naturally love, it takes a decision, daily choices, humility, and grace.  It takes selflessness.   Women don’t naturally respect their husbands, they’re human.  They want to do their own thing, and this culture tells them to be an independent woman - the opposite of honoring, respecting and submitting to a loving husband.  If your husband doesn’t love well, it’s hard to respect him.  If your wife doesn’t respect you, it’s hard to sacrificially love her.  But God didn’t say love your wife if she respects you.  He said, love your wife, lay down your life for her, like Jesus laid down his life for you, when you didn’t respect him.  Wives, God didn’t say respect your husband if he deserves it, God said respect your husband – his role if nothing else, to honor God if nothing else.  You respect the President of the United States, it doesn’t matter if your candidate is in the office or not.  God put him there, and God can take him out.  Husbands, God gave you a wife and He said to love your wife, with no qualifications.  Wives, God gave you a husband, He said to respect your husband, with no qualifications.  (Clearly this discussion is about people who obey God’s commands to treat all human beings with dignity.  So we’re not talking to spouses in abusive situations to stay in harm’s way.  That is not respecting your husband, to permit physical abuse.  We’re obviously not talking about those situations where separation is required for safety.)  But in normal marriages that are not abusive, why is it still so easy for married people to treat to their spouse worse than they treat others.  Familiarity breeds contempt?  No, it’s a ‘taking for granted,’ it is merely pure selfishness, rather than self-less-ness, that is the requirement of love and respect.  Some people say the rudest things to their spouse that they would never say to anyone else.  If you wouldn’t say that, or treat a co-worker that way, why are you treating your wife that way?  Why are you treating your husband that way?  You should be ashamed.  If we follow I Corinthians 13 – the love chapter, that’s how we should treat one another.  With patience, and kindness, not pride, never rude, self-less not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeping no record of offenses, truly forgiving and not holding it against them, always protecting, always trusting, always believing the best, always hoping, and always persevering in love, (persevering starts when you don’t want to), never failing to love and respect.  God said submit to one another in love.  So both husband and wife should love one another, and both husband and wife should show honor and respect, God’s word teaches that.  But God’s command:  Husband – you demonstrate love – lay down your life for your wife.  Wives - you show honor and respect for your husband.  Trust God to lead them to what they should do… you just do what you should do.   And if you’re not married yet…  Be very cautious in friendship (God said), be very cautious in who you marry. Those little things you see now, will be magnified then.  Just because they’re attractive, doesn’t mean they are of noble character.  What do they do when no one’s looking, what do they do when you’re not around?  What do they do under pressure?  Choose friends and a spouse wisely.  The best way to find the right one, is to become the right one.  See the Relationship Topics – 11 Things you need in a husband, and 11 Things you need in a wife.  Not to select one, but to become one!  You won’t change them, but you can change you! You can prepare to be what they need, God will take care of making them what you need.  You can even do this after you’re married.  But if you are not married yet, God’s way of approaching marriage – is polar opposite of the dating culture of this generation.  Husbands, praying that God will help you love your wife, and lay down your life for her.  If you ask Him, He will help you.  Do that first, don’t worry about if she is respecting you or not.  Leave her to God.  Wives, praying that God will help you respect your husband.  If you ask Him, He will help you.  Do that first, don’t worry about what He is now, let God make him respectable, you just respect him.  It’s amazing what God can do in your spouse, when you are committed to doing what God says, no matter what.   They say marriage takes a lot of work.  I don’t know if that’s true or not, but it does take humility, preferring them and their needs, over you and your needs.  If you love your job, it’s not really work.  Love your wife, Respect your husband, it’s God’s beginning step – His foundation for a successful marriage.  Ask Him, He’ll help you.  He wants you to have a great marriage!  One that reflects Him, one that your children hope they have someday.  That’s why He brought you the perfect partner.  Not perfect, perfectly suited to you.  Someone you can grow with.  They’re not the perfect spouse right now, neither are you, this is a journey, a journey of love.  It takes time, it gets better and better, if you will humble yourself, and do what God tells you, and trust them to Him.  Don’t look around, the grass isn’t greener – that’s just the devil’s lie to destroy your marriage, and destroy you.  Stick with this one, practice hedges.  You do you, and God will handle them.  If you will humble yourself, and commit fully, God’s grace will cover you, He will bring you to a unity where He commands a blessing.  It’s so worth it!      
 
Love you all,
dad

Love you all, praying for you.
 
I just love God’s Word, it is different than what you would expect.  Just the opposite.   If you ever get on the internet, there are a lot of people – millionaires, sharing what made them millions.  Some of them, maybe even most – genuinely want to help others achieve what they did, wealth (at least for now).  Others do it, because more clicks mean more money.  Of all the “become a millionaire” philosophies out there.  There are common threads…  “First, Invest in yourself, your own skills, knowledge and abilities – your best investment for the future, and your best hedge against economic uncertainty.  Then invest in index funds (sure things), but your best investment – invest in what you know.”  Dave Ramsey gave some widely respected advice to a fan who already had considerable money success.  What is your knowledge percentage?  80% Real Estate, 20% stock market?  Then your portfolio percentage should mirror that.  Ramsey said really wealthy people invest in only a couple of things, things they know, and they do them a lot.  Warren Buffet said the same thing.  I listened to a quick clip of an interview of billionaires asked “Was it worth it?”  Their responses were interesting, but quite frankly, saddening.  I can honestly say, not one of them is who I would aspire to.  God gave a warning in His Word.  Those who love money, and pursue money fall into temptation and a snare.  Even those who gained mega wealth themselves say – they know a lot of millionaires who are miserable.  God gave a real secret.  God owns it all, and gives it to whomever he chooses.  And He said a shocking thing.  To the wicked, He gives the task of storing up wealth, to give it to the one who pleases God.  So how do you filter advice, and whose advice are you pursuing?  Some of it has to be true, it results in money.  There are some things you can clearly do that result in money, not poverty.  Millionaires think a certain way, different than poor people do.  But what does God have for you?  God gave a warning, This is the fate of fools (who trust in themselves) and their followers who approve of their sayings.  Their bodies will rot in the grave far from the fine houses they lived in.  Not condemning a single one of them, I don’t know them, God knows their heart, He just warns us to be careful who we follow after.  God doesn’t think like rich people or poor people.  He thinks like God thinks.  That’s why He told us – transform your mind, so you think like I think.  It’s the mind of Christ.  That’s why PiVAT and PRISM are so important.  Get God’s plan for you today, and do it.  Keep PRISM, His Word on your mind and tongue, learn to think like He thinks!  God warned, Be careful what philosophy you pursue and adopt as your own.  Be sure it’s God who is leading you.  These philosophies are tricky.  What is your motive, and what part of these philosophies, are simply a discovery of God’s truth, versus deception in disguise?  And how do you discern?  What will you make?  Money, or Disciples?  What kind of disciples will you make? Whose disciples?  Is making money bad?  Your motive and how you go about it is where the danger lies.  If money is your measure of success, those who make disciples won’t measure up well in your eyes.  Some will, but not all.  Do you want to make money? Or make disciples?  Can you do both?  If you want both, it might be a good idea to seek God, to be sure that you’ve not convinced yourself you want both, but really want one - the money.  Like the guy who said, I want to land this million dollar deal, because God will get 10% of it. That’s funny, God doesn’t need to give you a windfall, so you tithe.  He owns the whole thing already, He can just keep it all.  God said, you cannot love God, and money.  God said to make disciples, not money, or money disciples.  He said, Godliness with contentment is great gain, and He revealed another secret, God gives wealth and adds no trouble to it.  This is where you need some friends who are God-obeyers in your circle of counsel.  Praying that you will pursue God’s commands above all others, seek a multitude of Godly counsel, exhort one other daily, walking with someone in an obedience relationship, and be sure you guard your heart against all kinds of greed.  It’s sneaky, or God wouldn’t have emphasized, all kinds…  Don’t measure people by their money, don’t measure them at all… let God do that, pray for them.  But measure yourself by your obedience.  God has different things for different people.  What does He have for you?  If you walk with someone daily, learning to obey, your life won’t be the same, but your obedience will be.  If you are seeking after God, His presence, and His Word, and if you obey what He tells you to do.  You can rest in His confidence knowing He will lead you, and provide for you.  Sometimes how He leads you will result in money generated, sometimes it won’t.  No matter where He leads you, these are the people of whom you can make disciples, helping them know the God who loves them and has such good things planned for their life.  Whatever He calls you to do, brings you in proximity with those who do similar things.  Some people pursue all the wealth building advice they can get.  The internet is full of it.  What if you pursued the wisdom of God through His Word, with the same intensity that aspiring millionaires pursue the advice of those who made it? the wisdom of this world to attain wealth.  God said seek first His Kingdom, and his righteousness and all these things will be added unto you.  But that doesn’t mean you’ll have the millions they do.  You’d have to do what they do, and believe like they do, plus luck, skill and timing – to get what they have, and they could lose it, in a moment.  Disaster or calamity could sweep it all away.  Is that what God wants you to pursue, and do and believe?  These are things you need to ask God.  God said in the house of the wise are stores of oil.  How did they get it and keep it?  God’s Word has instructions for it.  He said my people are destroyed by lack of knowledge.  (that’s not the absence of knowledge, that’s putting their faith in the wrong knowledge).  Destroyed means coming to ruin, loss.  Most people if they have money, end up losing it.  Not because the didn’t know enough about what Warren Buffet says, they don’t know enough of what God says.  Praying that you will pursue the knowledge of God, over the knowledge of men.   Praying that you won’t compare wealth.  You wouldn’t measure God’s plan for Mother Teresa, ministering to the destitute in Calcutta, by the value of her portfolio.  Praying that you will seek the Kingdom of God first, that your desire would be - to be simply - an obeyer, like Jesus.  That you would seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit, and be cautious in what knowledge you pursue.  So God will lead you in making disciples, obeyers, not in making money.  He may call you to things that make money, He may call you to things that make more or less money.  But everything here, will be left here, Money stays, People go with you.  Praying for wisdom, discernment, protection, that you would be on your guard against every form of greed.  But that you would fully pursue the presence and Word of God, and whatever training He requires of you – to put you in whatever sphere of influence He has created you for, so you can make disciples there.  His plans for you are good!  And they will include preparation, and discernment and hard work.  He reveals both, and gives grace for it.  He loves you, He has plans for your good, and good plans for your future.  Praying that His measure will be your measure.  So you make what He wants you to make.
 
Love you all,
dad 

Love you all, praying for you. 
 
I just love God’s Word.  It gives truth, wisdom and insight.   Have you ever heard someone say, “Don’t shoot the messenger.”  What they are saying is, don’t get mad at me, I didn’t say it, I’m just delivering the message.  That’s probably good advice.  Here’s another.  Learn to separate the message from the messenger.  A dependable messenger is the best one to send, Proverbs tells us that.   But what the messenger ultimately does, doesn’t change the message, whether they themselves heed it or not, that’s on them.  God taught me a powerful lesson some years ago.  We had a pastor from another country who spent an extended period of time in our home, a man of power and a man of prayer (funny how those two go together).  I was shocked by a story he shared.  In his country, they played an old video of a powerful minister, who had unfortunately fallen into moral failure.  That famous minister was no longer in ministry, but this pastor shared that when they played that video about Pentecost to a large audience… the Holy Spirit swept through the entire crowd with power, with signs and wonders.  I was shocked.  This minister on that video had fallen in disgrace.  And yet God used that old video recording to move so powerfully?  It didn’t fit my theology at the time.  How was that possible?  Because it was never the messenger, it was the message that contained the power.  That’s why Paul said, if anyone else, even me, preach a different message than the gospel we have preached, let them be forever condemned.  Yikes.  But Paul was trying to teach something.  Just like He taught the principle of the Bereans – don’t believe everything you hear, no matter who says it.  Test it through the Word of God by the Holy Spirit.  He was now adding to it… if I ever change what I’m preaching, or my choices become different, my choices don’t change the truth of this message.  So if I ever fall, if I ever rob banks, get into drugs, or pride, or run away with the secretary, don’t get confused between the message and the messenger.  Will that ever happen?  No.  By God’s grace.  Paul said, but for the grace of God, there go I.  We shouldn’t condemn others in pride, anyone can fall who chooses compromise.  Be careful what you choose.  We should take warning, and guard ourselves closely, choosing His grace, avoiding every appearance of evil.  One thing I’ve always felt sorry for God about… He has to use people to share his message.  People, who sometimes make bad choices.  But that doesn’t stop Him.  He knows the end from the beginning, yet He chooses to use imperfect people, flawed people, even people whom he knows will turn away.  Yet the message, the truth of His Word, stands firm forever.  There is a healthy fear that must accompany this message.  God loves us so much, He sent his Son to die in our place, he offers freedom!  Freedom from sin, but He doesn’t change our freedom to choose.  Praying that you will focus on the message, not the messenger, that you would test it by the Word and the Holy Spirit, and that the choices of people would never sway you, or dissuade you.  But that your choices would always be truth and light, obedience and victory, by the power of the Holy Spirit, and God’s unchangeable, unfailing Word.  And pray for those whom God has raised up to deliver His message, that God would guard them and guide them as well.  That He would guard and guide you!  His grace is sufficient, and He’ll help you choose it!
 
Love you all,
dad

Love you all, praying for you.
 
I just love God’s Word.  It tells you things that are counter-intuitive, counter-culture, counter-human-nature, counter-natural-instinct.  It tells you what brings success, not what most people do.  Your natural instinct is self-preservation, which easily becomes self-preference, not others-preference – which is love.  How often have you heard this advice...  “In life, you need to learn to pick your battles.  Choose wisely, not every hill, is the hill to die on.  Sometimes you need to learn - to live to fight another day.”  Kinda funny in a way… I guess you’ll just die tomorrow instead.  And even then, probably not the hill you wanted to die on.  Same death, just different hill, different day.  The truth is, there are just not that many hills to die on.  How many things are that important?  The toothpaste?  People have a right to be wrong.  Let them.  And then, learn a deeper way, a different perspective.  What is right about it?  Even the worst, petty, vindictive criticism of you – from someone who can’t stand you - may actually have some merit.  One percent is still some. Just because they are wrong or immature, the wise realize they still have more to learn.   God said let the wise listen and add to their learning.  Did you catch that?  A secret of gaining wisdom… listening required.  Not hill-dying required.  That’s not how you gain wisdom.  The wise want to gain wisdom, no matter how God brings it.  Would you be offended if driving by, - someone yelled, “The bridge is out! Moron!”  Would you look at your wife and say, ‘Can you believe how rude that guy was!  I can’t believe they would say thaaaaaat!!  Some people, are so offended by the delivery, they miss the truth, the wisdom – even if there's just 1%...  Praying that you won’t pick hills to die on, very few are.  Praying that you won’t live to fight another day, why do that?  What if you live to love another day, to find agreement another day.  It’s easy to find things to fight about.  Not much creativity or intelligence required there, much less humility.  God said, as much as it depends on you, live at peace with all men.  It doesn’t matter what they do?  Passing on an argument, is a demonstration of humility.  God said He opposes the proud, but gives grace (divine power) to the humble.  One He exalts, the other He opposes.  What will you do?  Remember what “WIN” means   Will  I  Now?  Not will they now?  That’s WTN – that’s not even a word, it’s just three letters.  Win means Will I Now – what will you choose?  Will I take the low place?  Will I let them talk, or insist on talking?  Have you noticed something that people say that’s just funny…  when they let you know…  “I’m just going to take the high road.”  No, that’s just humble arrogance, or arrogant humility, really false-humility, not humility.  Humility is taking the low place, not the high road.  When arguments entice you, or not even arguments, in any situation in life.  Three seconds to go in the championship game, or the first day of the off season.  The question if you are going to win, in this situation you face…  - Will I Now?  Will I listen instead of talk?  Will I be diligent, instead of lazy, will I obey, or delay?  Will I choose God’s way, or man’s way? Will I focus on them feeling heard, instead of me feeling heard?  Will I listen til I understand them, instead of talk until they understand me?  Will I let them be wrong, (or maybe right).  Will I pursue agreement, not disagreement?  Will I listen for the wisdom, and ignore the delivery?  Will I Now – humble myself, take the low place, do what is righteous, prefer them over me, seek peace and pursue it?  Praying that you will always W-I-N.  Doesn’t mean they lose, Let God bring the best for both of you.  Will I Now?  Is always a question when faced with any decision  - to walk in the Spirit, or let the flesh remain in control.  Praying that you’ll walk in the Spirit, your new nature, not in the flesh, your old nature.  Praying that Holy Spirit will lead you in love, not your human nature lead you in error.    Praying that you won’t pick hills to die on, to fight another day, but fields to live in! so you can love another day, just like today.  So God’s love shines through you.    
 
Love you all,
dad

Love you all, praying for you. 
 
I just love God’s Word.  It is truth and life.  It is the instruction manual for human behavior.  The hands-on training for how to treat people – how to win in relationships – if you follow it.  Have you ever seen people argue?  I even ran across something that said “How to win arguments”  I didn’t bother reading it.  That misses the point.  You can win the argument, and lose the relationship.  It’s not about being right, it’s about being righteous.  Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you.  All what things?   All every thing that is good, that will lead to fullness, peace, prosperity, and joy in your life, and everything you need.  Have you ever thought about this?  Why do people argue?  #1) They want to be right  #2) They don’t want to be wrong, even less, be told that they are wrong.  #3) They don’t want to listen, they want to be heard  #4) They don’t want to change – ignorance is bliss.  #5) They are proud, they are not humble.  #6) They want to change people’s minds.  #7) They want to control them, they want others to do what they want them to do.  #8) They want to think they won, when really, they lost.  #9) They are impatient – #10) They lack wisdom, “a man’s wisdom gives him patience.  #11) They don’t love.  Love means prefer others – their point of view.  That’s means not arguing, but listening.  It doesn’t mean you have to agree with them, or follow it, but it does mean you have to hear and understand them, and respect them enough to let them keep it, if they are not ready to change it.  Arguing is a loss for you as much as them, whether you think you won the argument or not.  You lost the opportunity to gain new information, or at least a new and deeper understanding, if not about the subject matter, about the person you are arguing with – who is precious to God.  You lost the opportunity to listen, to honor, and respect someone enough to let them be wrong if need be... (and much of the time, you’re wrong, they’re not).  Of all the reasons to argue not one is admirable, or commendable.  Speaking the truth in love is not an argument.  It can only happen in an environment of mutual respect, listening and understanding, so they drop their guard enough for you to plant seeds of truth.  How often are you right?  Far less than you think.  And when you are right… how often are you still wrong (in your approach, or delivery)?  More often than you realize.  God said "The wise overlook offense, they are quick to listen, (not quick to argue) -  any fool is quick to quarrel."  Just like, let another praise you and not your own mouth.  The same principle applies for defending yourself.  Verbal jousting isn’t as profitable as most people think.  The best defender of you is God, and the second best defender of you is others, not you.  Praying that you will gain a new skill – smelling.  That you would learn to smell an argument coming, so you can take another route instead, a better route.   Moments of non-conflict are far more effective than the heat of the moment.  It takes great wisdom and maturity not to argue.  God said it’s to a man’s honor, to avoid offense.”  To pass on the opportunity to argue… when you just gotta say something!  No, you don’t.  Let God speak.  He has many ways of doing so.  Let the Holy Spirit lead you.  The greatest influence is not an argument.  It’s listening.  Do you know the greatest bait that always starts an argument?  Needing to have the last word.  You can’t let that snide remark go unchecked.  You just can’t leave something unsaid…  So that next argument is off to the races.  Sometimes the most powerful, slam dunk, come-back - is silence.   Praying that you will learn to pray instead of say.  Praying that you will love them enough to let them be wrong (you might be), praying that you will seek to understand, before you seek to make your point.  Praying that you will become mature enough to leave things unsaid.  Praying that you will leave arguing to others, so you can grow in effectiveness. and influence, and in the image of the One who created you.  He doesn’t have to argue.  He invites. 
 
Love you all,
dad   

Love you all, praying for you. 
 
I just love God’s Word – it is the standard for discernment.  If you don’t have a bar, a standard to measure truth by, trying to discern it is difficult if not impossible.  Without a bar, it’s just a sliding scale.  It’s hard to score when the goalposts constantly move.  Just a quick reminder of your New Information Filter.  Every time you hear something, or something new.  #1 Is it true?  #2 Where is the evidence?  #3 What’s in it for them?  #4 What does God say?  This filter will help you test new information, as well as old, that you’ve been believing for a while.  Growing up in basketball circles, the pressure starts early to learn to be a team player.  But there’s a difference between “You can accomplish more as a team” and ‘everyone gets a turn.’  This isn’t the petting zoo, this is basketball.  “Pass the ball” the altruistic parents yell from the stands to your kid.  What they really mean is ‘pass the ball to my kid so he can shoot.’  Why do people want to score? To win?  Or to get the most points.  Usually the latter.  Michael Jordan said something interesting.  “There is no “I” in TEAM, but there is an “I” in WIN.”  In basketball you need at least one player who is team selfish.  That will ignore the criticism “you shoot too much.”  No, you just want your kid to shoot more, but he can’t shoot.  At least one person has to have the mentality – Give me the Ball!  Otherwise, the clock runs out, and you lose.  That’s not to excuse selfishness, or poor leadership.  The quote, you can get there fast, or you can get there together… reveals the truth that more can be accomplished together than individually.  But sometimes it comes down to you.  God gives us each other - the body of Christ, to help encourage, admonish, exhort, and affirm.  He makes us interdependent as well as dependent on Him.  He knows that two are better than one.  Encourage one other daily – is a guaranteed strategy for victory.  Praying that you will invite someone for a Daily Call!   But sometimes it comes down to you.  What does WIN stand for?   W-ill-I-N-ow.   No one can obey for you.  That’s up to you.  Going together is great, but if no one will go with you, will you still go?  Will you still obey?  If no one agrees, but God told you, will you do it?  Be careful, discernment required.  Sometimes, when no one agrees (especially if you have developed a counsel circle of obeyers), there’s a reason for it.  But sometimes, God told you.  Now it’s on you.   Will  I  Now?  What did God tell you to do?   If you’re going to pass the big test, start practicing now on the little ones.  PiVAT before dinner is the best “hearing God’s voice – so you know what to obey” – practice.  It’s the best prophetic practice, the best obedience practice.  Get His plans for you for today, and by the end of the day you’ll know if you heard Him.  Especially if you do PRISM with it.  It’s how you know, it’s how He reveals… So you can prove what is that good and acceptable and complete will of God.  Romans 12:1-2.  Basketball games don’t mean much.  Those wins are soon forgotten.  But the game of life is between obedience and disobedience.  God’s Way, or man’s way.  Either you win, or the devil wins.  You can’t wait on everybody else, you can’t depend on everybody else.  Sometimes is comes down to,  will you obey.   WIN – Will  I  Now?    Praying that you will be a winner.  That every time God prompts you – you are so used to obeying in the daily – that when the moments of truth that determine life and destiny come,  that still small voice is so distinctly clear, that it’s just ‘one more day at the office.’  Like Jordan’s 63 in the Garden, or Luka’s 60-21-10.  Praying that you will WIN.  That you will learn to obey every day, that every Will I Now?  Is always that choice to obey – that becomes a win.
 
Love you all,
dad

Love you all, praying for you,  This is a little longer, but important, I hope you’ll listen…
 
I just love God’s Word.  It gives truth.  Have you noticed that truth is uncommon, not common.  Many things common, aren’t truth.  Commonly accepted, isn’t what determines truth, in science or morality.  People used to think the earth was flat, that the sun revolved around the earth, pretty much unanimously.  A recent secular teaching seems to be gaining popularity in church circles.  The whole concept of self-love. Where did that come from?  “You have to love yourself, before you can love others.”  “God wants you to love yourself.”  Really?  Sounds right, but is it?  Remember your new information filter…  What verse is that, exactly?  God’s Word says, love the LORD your God, love your wife, love one another, love your neighbor, love your enemies, but it never says love yourself.  If that’s foundational, or a pre-requisite, or a pressing need of people, then why doesn’t the Bible teach it?  Jesus said, A new command I give you, love one another.  Not love yourself – “But how could you love one another if you don’t love yourself?”  I get it, I hear you… but Jesus never said that.  The Bible never says that.  Jesus said the new command was love one another – as I have loved you.  That’s all you need.  Jesus loves you, not you love you.  Jesus said, “The greatest commandment:  Love the LORD your God with all your heart, mind, and soul, and the Second is “Love your Neighbor as yourself.  Ahh, that’s where some say “See, that means you should love yourself.  Does it really?  Is that what it’s saying?  If it were, wouldn’t He say Love God, be sure to love yourself, and then you’ll be able to love your neighbor as yourself.  But it doesn’t say that, it doesn’t put ‘love yourself’ between love God, and love others.  He focused the command on love others.   God, then others - the self part was just talking about human nature – selfishness, self-preservation, self-preference.  That’s like teaching a child to disobey, you don’t have to  - their sinful nature already has taught them, that’s why God said, don’t think of yourself more highly than you ought.  He knew that was the problem, not love yourself…  He never said teach your children to disobey so I can forgive them someday.  He didn’t have to, kids just know how to disobey by nature.  So what about people with low self-esteem?  Your view of yourself if that is your pursuit is not a pursuit taught by Jesus.  Psychologists might tell you that, but if loving yourself was God’s focus for you, then why does He warn against it.  If He taught it, He wouldn’t warn against it.  Romans 12:3 – For by the grace given me, (I love that, Paul is saying – God gave me grace to say this to you so listen…) I say to every one of you:  Do not think of yourselves more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.   That is so interesting.  This would be the perfect verse for God to teach that theology about self-love – if he wanted to… if that was truth, or a need or a problem, or a priority for Him.  Because if you see yourself by faith… you would see yourself better in the future than you are right now – which would be the perfect way to learn to love yourself.  Because you suck right now, but if you see yourself by faith, you’ll be more self-love-able, more self-love-worthy – that’s how you can love yourself now.  But God never mentioned that, He never said that, never taught that.  God totally passed on that perfect opportunity to promote that theology, He didn’t teach it. Clearly that was not what God was saying.  Why?  Because the true secret of self-esteem is not in loving yourself.  Look at that verse again, don’t think of yourself more highly, but soberly (rationally) in accordance with your faith – that God has given you.   God didn’t explain it further saying…   Use your faith – remember, you can do all things through Christ,  – you can be rich, successful, whatever you dream you can fulfill, so love yourself by faith…  Faith that you can be better, richer, more successful would be a good little trick to learn – to get better at self love – if that’s what God wanted you to do, if God thought that was needed or required to love God or love others.  But it’s not. God never said that…  God never said self love helps you love others.  He never said use your faith to think of yourself more highly, to love yourself more. No, He said don’t think of yourself more highly than you ought, use your faith for something else, not self love…   So then what did he say that measure of faith is for?  He says it in the very next verse:  Rom 12:4 – Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.  Here it comes -  wait for it…  Verse 6 – We have different gifts, according to the grace given us, If a man’s gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith.   OK, now I get it.  That’s what the faith is for, not for self love, but for serving others in a greater way with your gift!  What’s the key to FAITH helping you view yourself with sober judgment?  Wouldn’t faith increase your opinion of yourself because you see by faith what you could become?  No, it’s clear that’s not the purpose for faith.  Faith isn’t to view yourself better, it’s to serve others better with your gift to the body!   Use your gift on behalf of – in the service of - the body of Christ.  The more faith you have the more you’ll use your gift – on behalf of others, to love them, not yourself.  If your faith compels you to activate your gift for the benefit of others, it’s not about loving yourself, (that’s not the point, that’s a red herring – a false flag, something that distracts you from the real issue).  God said use your faith to distribute your gift, to serve others – loving them in action.  Love God, Love Others.  Sober judgment faith pertains to your responsibility as the gift holder to use it for the benefit of the body of Christ – the other people God says everyone belongs to… Faith is for using your gift, it grounds you, so you don’t think of yourself more highly than you ought.  Because if you’re using your gift to serve others – you’re thinking more highly of them, you’re not worried about loving yourself.  You’re fully fulfilled in using your gifts to serve others.  Love God, Love others, and your self esteem will be wrapped up in God’s esteem for you.  He loves you enough to die for you, He gave you awesome gifts.   Most people who hate themselves.  1) Haven’t discovered their gift or how to use their faith to use that gift to better serve others with it.  2) They believe the devil that their sins and failures make them worthless, you’ll probably do it again.  The devil’s a liar, that’s not true in the least.  When you were yet a sinner, Christ died for you, He loves you with an everlasting love, and will forgive you as long as you live - every time you ask him and turn from it. and His grace is there for your victory next time  3) They feel inferior because other people have controlled and manipulated them into feeling inferior.  “You never do things right, you never say things right,” and here it comes the typical one… ‘you think you’re better than everyone.’   All of these are a lie, as old the hills, but some people start believing these false accusations, and are held in the bondage of the false accusation of others – doing the devil’s work.  Jesus died to set you free from false beliefs  and 4) people think they need to learn self-love because they haven’t seen the victory in their life or the accomplishments in their life that God wants for them, because they are between harvests.  They don’t know their spiritual gifts, and they’re not using their faith to distribute their gift in serving others.  They haven’t sown good seed long enough to see the harvest.  You must stop sowing bad seed (words and actions) in your life, and start sowing new seed – truth and diligence, in words and actions) and give God some time, to bring a new harvest from your new seed.  It’s not about lacking self-love.  God said don’t think of yourself more highly, He didn’t say you gotta love yourself.   He loves you more than you ever could anyway, and more than you ever know.  The secret of self love is realizing it’s a red herring, a distraction, not a real need.  Love God, love others, use your faith to use your gift to serve them, know God’s Plan for you and walk in it, Know God’s Word and speak it.  Walking in obedience, to the LORD in words and actions until God can bring a harvest in your life from the obedience seed you’re now sowing.  And even when your harvest becomes victory and the old has fully gone, you won’t even think about loving yourself, you’ll just think about loving God, and others – And God will give you a peace, and joy, and a contentment that He is fulfilling His purpose in you.  You can trust Him.  He will do it.  You just do what He tells you, and He will do the rest.  Take joy in the journey – Love God, love others, love one another, grow your faith, use your gifts to serve, and God will establish you with a sound mind, and a sound life.  He loves you, so you can love Him and others! 
 
So how should you think of yourself?  It God said, do not think of yourself more highly that you ought, that means you should at least think of yourself as highly as you should.  Is that self love?  Probably not…  Self-confidence isn’t self love.  It’s just an understanding of who you are.  The Bible said Jesus, though He was equal with God didn’t insist on his position, which he could have rightfully done, but humbled himself, and put on the human suit, and came to earth as a baby.  That means he took the lower position that humility does.  He chose the lower place, but He didn’t think of himself lower, He knew who He was, He didn’t have a self-love problem, He just was humble.  But am I just trash?  Of course not.  God said you were fearfully and wonderfully made!  God don’t make no junk.  He said He formed you in your Mother’s womb – you are a masterpiece designed by the Creator of the Universe.  But that truth, doesn’t make you love yourself, you didn’t do anything to make you that wonderful… That truth makes you love God, and wonder… what is it that He created me for?  I want to do that!  Those truths about you should make you grateful, should make you love God and be thankful.  The Bible says the potter makes some vessels of noble use, and some of normal use.  I’d rather be a decorative pot on a fireplace mantle in a palace, than just a water pot, but that’s not the decision of the pot, that’s a decision of the potter.  God made you for a purpose, and He will fulfill his purpose for you.  And actually, I’d rather be a water pot that helps people, than just a palace decoration.  Your greatest fulfillment will be to be used as designed.   God didn’t make me like Warren Buffet, or Elon Musk.  I’m just not at that level… But God designed you for what He needs, and what will make you the most fulfilled if you do it!  God said as a man thinketh in his heart so is he.  So even though God has made you wonderfully, if you think otherwise, the devil can steal the joy of what God made you to do.  But the remedy isn’t self love, it’s humility, discovering and using your gift by faith to help others – its learning to be diligent to know and do what God called you to do today.  If I love God and love others, growing your faith to grow the using of your gift – that is where the joy comes from.  Self-love won’t bring you joy.  Only knowing God, the Holy Spirit, and doing what He planned for you will bring joy.  You’ve been faithful with a little, I’ll now put you in charge over much, enter into the joy of your Master…  The joy is in the obedience, not the self-love.  God never made that your focus.   Love God, Love others, Do what God tells you – and joy will overflow in your life.  You’ll think of yourself as you ought.  Wonderfully made for His purpose – He’ll complete it! 
 
Love you all,
dad

Love you all, praying for you,
 
I just love God’s Word.  It changes your thinking.  That’s why PRISM is so important.  Have you ever gone through a full day without getting to the most important part – your PRISM time with Him.  That Word that changes you and prepares you?  What He wanted to tell you because you need it for today?  We had a crazy day – one thing go wrong after another.  It was late, I haven’t done any PRISM today yet, but before bed, no matter how late, I decided to obey, and spend that PRISM time with God in His Word.  And He showed me, what He wanted to show me earlier.  Psalms 128:1 – Blessed are all who Fear the LORD, who walk in His ways.  You will eat the fruit of your labor, blessings and prosperity will be yours.  So if you Fear the LORD, if you walk in His ways, you are blessed.  That means, happy, straight, level, right, to go forward, prosper.  All who fear the LORD are happy, moving forward, prospering.  You will eat the fruit of your labor, blessings and prosperity will be yours.  So if you fear the LORD and walk in His ways you are blessed, you will have blessings and prosperity.  So is it coming? Or do you have it?  When everything goes wrong at once, blessing and prosperity will be yours if you Fear the LORD and walk in His ways.  That means if you do those things, and all those other things happen, you have it.  When you do it, you have it.  When you buy a ticket to the game today, you get in the stadium.  You have the ticket, means you get in.  Not you will get in someday, you get in today.  Fear God, Walk in His Ways, you are happy, moving forward, prosperous!  What do circumstances have to do with blessing and prosperity?  When everything goes wrong, are you no longer blessed or prosperous?  You are if you walk in His ways.  Your response to setbacks, losses, frustrations, and inconvenience is what enables blessing and prosperity, if you fear the LORD and walk in His ways, His ways are to prosper you in every circumstance.  Do you have blessing and prosperity but don’t recognize it?  Are you looking at what went wrong or the five things in row that went wrong, instead of the blessing and prosperity that are yours?  It’s still there.  The fruit of your labor of Fearing God and walking in His ways is you stay blessed and prosperous no matter what happens, no matter what you face or go through.  When it rains, and then pours, and then rains and pours again.  You Fear God, you walk in His ways, you are blessed and prosperous.  When difficulties come, walk in His ways – so you stayed blessed and prosperous.  When you do it, it’s yours.  You are blessed and prosperous no matter what the setback!  How do you know people who are prosperous? Circumstances don’t change their outlook.  When you are prosperous your face shows it, no matter what happens.  If it will be - if you do it, then when you do it you have it.  It has nothing to do with your circumstance.  Eating the fruit of your labor means blessing and prosperity will be yours despite the circumstance that you are facing right now.  What determines blessing and prosperity, circumstance or mindset?  If you have a mindset of blessing and prosperity (full confidence and peace), because you fear the LORD and walk in His ways, circumstance doesn’t matter.  It’s like Warren Buffet, you have enough – you make money when the stock market goes up or down.  Up and your companies increase in value, and when the stock market goes down you just buy up more companies at bargain prices.  Fear the LORD, walk in His ways, and blessing and prosperity will be yours.  Just like buy a ticket and entrance to the game will be yours.  It’s the fruit of your labor, not the fruit of circumstance.  Romans 12:2 - Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world (those who consider blessing and prosperity by circumstances, it comes and goes)  but be transformed by the renewing of your mind (which is what happens when you Fear the LORD and walk in His ways)  Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is (that you be blessed and prosperous in every circumstance, which is His Word and Obedience when you know what He told you to do)  Which is you walking in His good pleasing and complete will.  Fear the LORD and walk in His ways, and your faith grows.  And faith is what makes blessing and prosperity yours in every circumstance.  So what do you believe?  Do you Fear the LORD?  Do you walk in His Ways?  He said you are blessed, blessing and prosperity (when you do that) will be yours.  What do you think?  Are you, or not?
 
Love you all,
dad

Love you all, praying for you,
 
I just love God’s Word.  It gives truth and wisdom for big and little things.  Springtime, and love is in the air.   Here is one of the big decisions in life.  The person you marry.  Young lady, if your heart is to one day be married, to have a marriage that lasts a lifetime, that honors God, that is a true partnership with your best friend, becoming one, and becoming an example of how following God’s plan and walking in His ways, produces the ultimate blessing of marriage in your life.  If this is what you are praying for.  A couple of very practical things when considering candidates. Can we talk?  Males come in three kinds; boys, dogs, and men.  Never date boys – they cannot lead you.  And your husband has to be the leader of your home, spiritually and otherwise.   Never date dogs, you know what dogs do, they’ve done it before, they’ll do it again.  And never date men… huh?  Yes, never date men, marry one.  The man God is preparing for you, He also wants to prepare you for!  The man God has for you is waiting for you.  He’s not focused on skirts, he’s not dating other girls, becoming intimate in conversation, attention, and affection.  He’s saving that for you!  He’s focused on God, and what God told him to do today, in this hour.  Will you be faithful to him even now?  Young men, will you be faithful to her even now?  The best preparation, get wisdom, learn the fear of the LORD.  Obey fully God’s plan for you today.  And soak in His Word, so wisdom is on your tongue, and in your heart.  Godly young lady, here’s another hint.  Five Tests.  You can tell a man by what he looks at, and what he laughs at, who his friends are, what he says, and how he prays.  What does he look at?  Is he always looking at nice cars, nice houses, nice clothes?  Is he all about material things? He loves money, not God.  Doesn’t matter if he goes to church.  If you get tied up with him, you’ll be stuck in the curse.  Does he look at every female who walks by?  He doesn’t have a neck problem, he has a heart problem.  If He doesn’t have eyes for you only, don’t waste your time or emotions.  And you don’t find that out by dating him, you need to find that out before you invest the first minute in him.  Who are his friends?  They reflect him.  Are they the kind that bring strippers to the bachelor party?  Not the husband for you.  The friends aren’t the problem, they just reflect it, it’s his character.  Does He have religious friends?  Those who go to church, but live like the world?  Are his friends, humble, respectful, God-obeyers who push each other to Godliness, not worldliness?  Friends reveal the person.   What does he laugh at?  Does the suffering of others make him laugh, does he find that funny?  Does he laugh at the crude, vulgar, and shameless conversations of the godless?  It’s a character issue.  You won’t change his character, you’ll just be stuck with it.  What he does before you are married, he will do even more after you are married. What does he say?  Are his words life?  Does his mouth overflow with the truth of God’s Word, does he build others up, are his words faith, not fear, honor, not dishonor, blessing not cursing?  Does he complain when things go wrong, is he easily frustrated or upset by little things? Or when things don’t go his way? Or does he speak life, speak faith, count it all joy, and put his trust in the LORD.  Does he speak God’s Word to the storm or complain about it?  Is his humor dissing others, tearing them down, but like the fool, ‘only joking.’  Does he say negative things about others, does he build up or tear down?  Is what comes out of his mouth - faith-filled, God’s Word directed things?  You can tell what he believes by what he says.  Is he gullible, politically influenced by the socialists? The Godless? The crowd-think of current culture?  Or does he speak the truth of God’s Word, and operate in the humility and wisdom of God?  How does he treat others, how does he treat his mother?  And have you ever heard him pray?  Is it a formal interaction with an outside force? Is it a frivolous familiarity lacking honor, fear, and respect?  Or when he prays, does it reveal a level of intimacy that comes from full submission…  He’s done this before, a lot.  It’s a conversation with his father, boss and friend, you can tell there’s relationship there, obedience there, there’s history there between him and God, it’s a multiple-times-a-day thing with him.  How they pray will indicate the kind of relationship they have with God, a force or a friend, submitted, or seeking stuff.  One young lady said, I could tell by the way he prayed, he wasn’t the one God had for me.  
 
Young woman or man of God.  One of the most important decisions you will make in your life is your view on dating.  What affections will you give someone who is not your spouse?  Physiological chemistry is a powerful force. If you are dating people – there are attractive people out there.  They have no character, but high sex appeal.  You could end up having kids with someone God never wanted you to give the time of day to.  But it’s not just about avoiding sex before marriage, is that the only thing you want to save for your spouse?  What about the other affections, intimacy, and conversations – that God wants you to share with your spouse alone?  All of the individual emotional investment you give to those you date, when you’re married you will forsake all others, so why give those precious things to multiple guys or multiple girls, that you will not continue friendships with.  Your friend group when married, won’t be all your ex’s.  You won’t have any contact with them.  So how much of yourself do you want to give away?  Why would you give them any intimate parts of you?  Do you have to date people to find who God wants you to marry?  Some people believe that.  But forming personal intimate bonds with those you will not marry, leave just heartache, and heartbreak in their wake.  Those bonds will have to be broken.  Amicably or dumpster fire, it’s still painful, and they will take a piece of you with them.  God has better.  Consider Godly courtship, saving one on one time and relationship with someone you both feel God may have you marry, and are willing to start the brief discovery process to determine if this is the one God chose for you to marry.  It won’t take long, and when he confirms it. Get married.  If you’re not able to do that, if you’re ready to get married as soon as God confirms it… it’s not time for that kind of one on one investment yet.  Dear young man or woman of God, your view on dating will affect your marriage, even who you marry, it could prevent you from marrying the one God has chosen for you.  Be careful, decide beforehand, before you are under the influence… it can happen suddenly, you can fall in love quickly, that feeling isn’t what makes a marriage last.  “In love” is not choosing to love.  Character determines that.  Make your decision now, decide beforehand – your view on dating.  God has a better way.  Praying that you’ll choose well.  Don’t give the devil any opportunity to try to ruin you.  You can trust God to lead you to the perfect one for you.  Be willing to wait.  Focus on God, His Plan for you today, His Word, and the wait will be way easier… you won’t really think about it, you’re too busy being about your Father’s business.  And as you do that, you will suddenly find, God has brought you alongside, the one He has chosen for your best good.  But if you don’t decide what your view is, and what God wants for you in the preparing, in the waiting…  the devil will try to ruin you with dating entanglements, and heartbreaks.  Romantic involvement with someone you won’t marry, does not honor your husband or your wife, and it will cloud your ability to even hear God’s voice. 
 
Praise God!  You can believe His Word, and trust him.  Your past is past.  You are not responsible for that now, you cannot change it.  Praise God, you are forgiven for every bad choice, intentional or ignorance… God has made you clean.  So now, from this point forward, what will you do?  You cannot leave sin behind if you still do what people do who fall into it, or you still hang with those who do. If you date like the world does, you’ll do what the world does.  God has better.  The season of seeking a spouse seems so long, but it’s really just a short segment of your life.  Be faithful in it.  Keep your eyes on HIM, and His will for you, not on the opposite sex, everyone of which you will not marry (except one).  Trust God, Pursue Him.  If you chase it, it escapes you, if you chase God, He brings it to you.   Praying that you won’t date, spending one on one time, before it’s time, until both of you are committed to pursuing God’s will for you to marry this person, and if he says yes, marry them!  Some people aren’t ready to get married yet, so one on one conversations, time and intimacy together – that husbands and wives do… are premature.  Guard your heart in this area.  So you marry the one of God’s choosing in His perfect time, so you can start life together – walking in the center of His will, fulfilling the purpose He created for both of you – together.  So how do you marry someone if you never date?  First observe their character in groups, not isolated with them.  Every guy can talk a good game one on one, and affections can grow quickly – with someone God doesn’t have for you.  But in groups their character is revealed.  Isolated conversations, time alone with another person, which leads to romantic involvement, is really what dating is.  Save those intimate times for the one that God will lead you to marry, when both of you are committed to discover quickly if this is the one God has for you, and if He confirms it, you will marry them immediately.  But if you or they are not in the season or position to start that short path to marriage, you’re just dating, and bonds can form quickly, that are very hard to separate.  Not everyone agrees to this high of a standard, but your husband or wife will appreciate your commitment to God and them, before you even met them.  It is being faithful to them, before God brings them.  A marriage to someone willing to do that, will last a lifetime.  Praying that you will review the Relationship Topics on Opposite Sex and Marriage, with a humble, open heart and mind.    You don’t have to agree with every single point, but what you will have to decide is what you believe, and what is God’s will for you, in this area.  Praying that you will choose His best!  It’s so worth it! 
 
Love you all,
dad